AVENGED SEVENFOLD

Go into the water...

2008-10-30T01:27:14Z

We call out to the beasts of the sea to come forth and join us, this night is yours
Because, one day we will all be with you in the black and deep
One day we will all go into the water

Go into the water
live there die there
live there die

We reject our earthly fires
Gone are days of land empires
Lungs transform to take in water
Cloaked in scales we swim and swim on

We are alive, and we'll metamorphasize
And we'll sink as we devolve back to beasts
Our home is down here, and we've known this for years
We must conquer from the sea, we build an army with water steeds

We'll rise, from our depths down below
Release yourselves, drown with me
We will conquer land with water

Gone are days of land empires
Lungs transform to take in water
Cloaked in scales we swim and swim on
We swim on
We swim on

tonight

2008-10-14T14:58:49Z

i can finally lay my head down and rest

its .................done

Moving On...

2008-10-13T00:14:36Z

Silence ...And Goodbye.

Smitten

2008-09-13T06:09:13Z

hehehe im soo happy i think ive really found the one she awesome and perfect for me.......

9 days to go yay

x.

atreyu_curse @ 2008-09-08T18:15:00

2008-09-08T08:16:16Z

Oh, you and me, we're the same
Asking for more than the numbing existence
Offered us all
What did they say? What did they do?
To make you crawl back in
Despite everything that you've been through
You're still right where I left you
We can lift up our hands to the sky
Find all of those strings that they're pulling and keep from falling back
Into our old rhythmic poses
Turning us into machines
And one of these days we'll no longer betray ourselves
In any way we won't all look the same way down
And one of these days we'll no longer betray ourselves
In any way and we'll all take the same way out
And all these illusions dropped on a sea of believers
Crowding around as they hunt me down
And throw me out
While all the rest of the others
Bang their heads in the dredges
So don't give up on me
We can be still pretend
This is all just a game
That'll work itself out in the end

hmmmm

2008-09-01T12:21:02Z

God Doesnt forgive murders..........

He Burns Them....

hmmm

2008-08-31T09:25:53Z

hes dangerously close to stepping over the line
and so want him to join my collection....
It wont be my finest hour but can make an exception .....
It would be very easy ....for him to dissapear...

Over....

2008-08-31T08:45:27Z

U And ME no more.................... its fucking over....................................

Blood

2008-08-28T09:28:18Z

Blood sometimes it sets my teeth on edge....

Other times it helps me control the chaos...

Who Am I

2008-08-24T11:30:10Z

i dont know where to start..... there so much on my mind i feel compelled to get it out of my head

These past couple of days have beeen very different for me and im trying to come to terms with all this thoughts in my head,
I feel differnt or like im changing into something ive been waiting for these past 27 years and 8 months
It feels very wrong from what ive been brought up too belive ....but in the same time it feels natural like i was always this way just never really brought it up to the surface of my true self, but these past days have rock my foundation to rumble,
My beliefs my code of life its all changing and NOW , Now that im alone .....
ive always been round good people , good friends and family i think thats why im like this now ...alone all my thoughts are mine and my own.
Ive also pulled away from them lately , thats why i think its coming up to the surface now that im alone to myself and my doings .
Is this the time for me ????to evolve into what ive been searching for in myself all these years , Im alone now more then i ever been.. Aidan my best friend hes to far gone and ive change into something else ..all honestly hes proably wouldnt conect with me like we used too and hes was my closest friend in this world .
Hayley alot of things come to mind with her she was a very close and dear friend,lover, and party bubby , but she is on her own road in life now and i think its closing for us like where slipping away fading out of each others life , but thats not her fualt she has her own demons to face and find her true self too ive always had that connection with her we both r fuck up in are own way . But she is strong more then she know i think and i know in my heart she will be ok in the end .
Monique , nick , john ,adam, friends at work and even amy........All these people ive cut off in some way or another, cause of whats been happing to me lately , i find myself putting up a front or a mask to hide from them what i really am , its easy ive been doing it all my life and now i feel the change in me all the more stronger lately and now i find myself fully cut off from them competely..
I Wake up in the morning go to work act like everything is fine in my world, talking and hangout is easy then i go home ...
Home ...its the one place where i feel at ease cause im alone to my thought, where i dont have to pretend and its the only thing that i get relif from ....Where the darkness inside me can come out to breath and play
Ive always had this darkness in me , always talking to me wanting to come out, But ive found ways to make it ease, make it happy in a sence, but now its stronger more hungry always wanting more ...
Ive been trained to hide it to bend in with everyone , if people knew the really truth they would run screaming for there life
I Am A monster i know that , ive always know that but im not your normal monster i have rules codes i go by and ive never broken that code not once its what makes me different from all the rest.
Hes tought me that and im truely thankful for him
He show me how to do it , how to be clean and how to bend in and most important how not to get caught
But like i said im alone now and its up to me, im on my own , but that was what he teached me its safer to be alone , Never letting people get close to me ...finding out
Thats why its so hard to have a girlfriend, for one a girl can sence a man been fake but its one of my rules bending in ...looking like a normal person all the tricks of the trade of a normal life , where its anything but ..
But now its more hungry the darkness it want more it want to come out like its tired of hiding and ive found myself thinking and fight to hold back the erges ....
Erges i would have dismiss on a normal day but its getting harder each day
i have to find more things to fill the time and the void keep it happy or i can see myself getting found out, nothing last for ever i know that but i have to much work to do before i hang up my towel so to speak.
Also ive found a new friend in a sence, but hes wouldnt be your normal friend but im connected to him hes like Me only better, i do feel like a student in a masters class he know more about me the i couldnt belive we r very much the same and im learning so much from him
Hes like me he has rules and hes own code which is similar to my own ..
But also on that note i think there some pattern to hes teaching and my darkness growing stronger i only hope i still can control it but i cant stop seeing him , for now i need him
I'll watch , learn everything i can learn, Ive had two teachers now in my life the first tought me how to hide it and to not get caught now this new teacher is showing me how to master my craft and hes tought me the same lesson the first did , people like me will always be alone its r nature
But its great to finally meet someone like me, there out there doing there own thing each day like me hiding , pretending ...and working

For now i'll leave it at that i feel like ive gotten some of it off my chest and things are alittle clearer now , im must stay focus.

Why

2008-08-20T12:00:16Z

Why fucking wasted my time honestly the more i try the more it seems helpless

What Do U Want Of Me.....

yes yes

2008-08-17T08:04:45Z

Amy and me went to a anime party she was a school girl ...

Yum.....

...

2008-08-13T09:58:37Z

This world is a cruel place
and we're here only to lose
so before live tears us apart let
death bless me with you

We are so young
our lives have just begun
but already we're considering
escape from this world

And we've waited for so long
for this moment to come
was so anxious to be together
together in death

This world is a cruel place
and we're here only to lose
so before live tears us apart let
death bless me with you

Fuck OFF

2008-08-11T06:27:48Z

u cunts r all lie and im sick of it , leave me alone and dont bother me again u all know who u are and trust me im not going to change my mind this time

So Fuck Off If U...

lie.....

backstab ....

Two face...

Break promises....

so yeah u know who u r and if your not sure i'll fucking tell ya...

???

2008-07-27T14:04:19Z

I think I NEED My Meds Again............................................

Im Going Crazy

2008-07-27T12:05:42Z

i swear to god wtf is going on with me since last nite i swear to god i can here voice like in my head am i really really going crazy have i lost it ....

it comes and goes since last nite only heard it twice today just voice they sound like a girl whispering softly almost cant make it out buut i hear them what is wrong with me im freaking out...........

tonights song for ya

2008-07-24T09:24:33Z

Solitary Man

Belinda was mine 'til the time that I found her
Holdin' Jim
And lovin' him
Then Sue came along, loved me strong, that's what I thought
Me and Sue
But that died, too

Don't know that I will but until I can find me
A girl who'll stay and won't play games behind me
I'll be what I am
A solitary man
A solitary man

I've had it to hear - being where love's a small word
A part time thing
A paper ring
I know it's been done havin' one girl who loved you
Right or wrong
Weak or strong

Don't know that I will but until I can find me
The girl who'll stay and won't play games behind me
I'll be what I am
A solitary man
A solitary man

Don't know that I will but until Love can find me
And the girl who'll stay and won't play games behind me
I'll be what I am
A solitary man
A solitary man

Solitary man

WtF

2008-07-23T00:12:34Z

what the hell is goin on with u??????

the only way i can even talk to u and now i cant......

block me???

delete me then??

Tonights song i luv

2008-07-22T10:18:41Z

Wicked Game

The world was on fire, no one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
I'd never dreamed that I'd need somebody like you
And I'd never dreamed that I'd need somebody like you

No I don't wanna fall in love
(this world is only gonna break your heart)
No I don't wanna fall in love
(this world is only gonna break your heart)
With you

What a wicked game to play
To make me feel this way
What a wicked thing to do
To let me dream of you
What a wicked thing to say
You never felt this way
What a wicked thing you do
To make me dream of you

No I don't wanna fall in love
(this world is only gonna break your heart)
No I don't wanna fall in love
(this world is only gonna break your heart)
With you

The world was on fire, no one could save me but you
It's strange what desire will make foolish people do
No and I never dreamed that I'd love somebody like you
I'll never dream that I lose somebody like you, no

Now I wanna fall in love
(this world is only gonna brake your heart)
Now I wanna fall in lust
(this world is only gonna brake your heart)
With you

And nobody loves no one

ttodays feelings

2008-07-20T13:43:08Z

FOR U

In the grace of your love I writhe, writhe in pain
In 666 ways I love you and I hope you feel the same

I'm for you
I'm for you

I'm killing myself for your love and again all is lost
In 777 ways I love you 'til my death do us apart

I'm for you - and I'm dying for your love
I'm for you - and my heaven is wherever you are
I'm for you - and I'm dying for your love
I'm for you - and my heaven is wherever you are

In 666 ways I love you and my heaven is wherever
you are

I'm here for you - I am here for you
I'm here for you - I am here for you
I'm here for you - I am here for you
I'm here for you - I am here for you

sick

2008-07-19T03:03:01Z

Heartache's knocking on her door
Shadows dance outside her window
Tears keep falling on the floor
As the world around her crambles

If you wanna save her
Then first you'll have to save yourself
If you wanna free her from the hurt
Don't do it with your pain
If you wanna see her smile again
Don't show her you're afraid
'Cause your circle of fear is the same

Love can be as cold as grave
A one way ticket to endless sorrow
An empire of gentle hate
Today without tomorrow

If you wanna save her
Then first you'll have to save yourself
If you wanna free her from the hurt
Don't do it with your pain
If you wanna see her smile again
Don't show her you're afraid
'Cause your circle of fear is the same

It's the circle of regret
The circle of hate
The circle of death
Your circle of fear is the same
Your circle of fear is the same

If you wanna save her
Then first you'll have to save yourself
If you wanna free her from the hurt
Don't do it with your pain
If you wanna see her smile again
Don't show her you're afraid
'Cause your circle of fear is the same

Your circle of fear is the same

Feelin

2008-07-17T11:32:24Z

I love your skin oh so white
I love your touch cold as ice
And I love every single tear you cry
I just love the way you're losing your life

Ohohohohoh my Baby, how beautiful you are
Ohohohohoh my Darling, completely torn apart
You're gone with the sin my Baby and beautiful you are
You're gone with the sin my Darling

I adore the dispair in your eyes
I worship your lips once red as wine
I crave for your scent sending shivers down my spine
I just love the way you're running out of life

Ohohohohoh my Baby, how beautiful you are
Ohohohohoh my Darling, completely torn apart
You're gone with the sin my Baby and beautiful you are
You're gone with the sin my Darling

Death note....

2008-07-11T07:51:09Z

In My Hands The Means......

In My Heart The Will....

times r changing

2008-07-10T12:25:14Z

well its been ages since i wrote in here last but alot have happen in thhat time

losing monique was hard but not really for some reson i knkew we would never last but we did have fun and it was a good change to have a good girlfriend for a change

the other really big thing thats happen is the my deepest sadness of the lost of my hero dave my brother
hes taught me sooo fucking much of pride and strength and honour everythink i wanted to be like him and my father.....

Ive nevertold anyone about this but was always terrifed that one day i would lose him in war or something and really i thought i would not be strong enough to go on with him and i would take me own life just to be by hes side once more because even thou i love my brother never really had a close realationship with him cause hes was in the army and always goin i miss out on having a brother in my toughts years in life but i think in the end of it all everything hes done for me has been the right thing and that whats hes teach me has saved me from not living on .....

now there a little girl my brother little girl , she lives in him and i hope to god one day i can tell her how much hes save me and how strong and amazing he was and also to make him proud of me and to be the best uncle to the most special child in my world

To my dear brother one day we will meet again i will find u brother and we will talk n talk for ever and makeu laugh like u told me how easy it was to make him laugh and how funny i am to him haha i think jst to be in hes presence when i leave this world, will be better then if i met god or knew the meaning of life

We wil meet again dear brother but not yet ......not yet
R.I.P David scott john thomas MY BROTHER.

God

2007-01-29T07:53:51Z

please please please please please please please please god give me strenght